


Love is stored in the flower

by Windfighter



Category: Stand Still Stay Silent
Genre: 5+1 Things, Everything is Beautiful and Everything Hurts, First Date, Flowers, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Language of Flowers, M/M, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, The Author Regrets Everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-05 00:00:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20479613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Windfighter/pseuds/Windfighter
Summary: 6 times Emil brought flowers for Lalli and one time Lalli brought flowers for Emil





	Love is stored in the flower

**Author's Note:**

> So today is the SSSS-forum's five years anniversery and to celebrate I decided to write a tiny 5+1-story!  
...I got overeager and made it 6+1 instead.
> 
> So anyway strap yourself in for another Windy-story! I don't think you need more warning than that, y'all should know what that means by now.

#1

”Happy birthday!”

Lalli blinked awake. A bouquet of flowers was infront of his face and he narrowed his eyes, gazed through them and noticed Emil on the other side. Emil gave a goofy grin and backed away, allowing Lalli to roll out from under the bed. Lalli yawned, rolled out and sat up. He yawned again and looked at Emil. Emil, who was in his apartment, in his _bedroom_, with a bouquet of flowers.

”Flowers?”

”Yeah”, Emil smiled and his eyes grew softer. ”Mother taught me that flowers are for people you care about.”

Lalli tilted his head and Emil's cheeks turned pink.

”I brought cake and some real gifts as well... if you don't like them. It's okay. I understand.”

Lalli reached out, grabbed the flowers. His lips twitched into a slight smile.

”I like them, they're... flowery.”

Emil chuckled, got up from the floor and gestured towards the kitchen.

”I'll throw together some food, come join me when you're ready?”

Lalli nodded. Emil left and Lalli's eyes fell down to the flowers again. Red and yellow tulips. He leaned against the bed and looked at the ceiling instead. He had planned to just sleep through his birthday, but of course Emil wouldn't let him. _Shouldn't have given him a key to my apartment._ He stretched, got up from the floor and looked at the flowers in his hand. He didn't actually regret giving Emil the key.

#2

Lalli was making dinner when the doorbell rang. He glanced at the clock, lowered the heat of the stove. He wasn't expecting a visitor. He threw the apron over a chair and went to open the door. A large bouquet of red roses greeted him.

”Do you want to be my valentine?”

Lalli blinked. The roses sank a little and Emil's blue eyes became visible. They were wide and there was a pink tint on his cheeks. Lalli looked from him to the roses. He had heard about valentine, Tuuri had told him about it once. It was something they used to do in the old world, something with... Friends? Love? He hadn't paid attention. Emil turned his gaze down.

”I just...” he grabbed Lalli's hand and placed the bouquet in it. ”I have a crush on you, I just wanted you to know. It doesn't need to lead anywhere if you don't want to.”

Red roses for love. Lalli remembered Tuuri talking about that once too. He missed her. His shoulders sank and he noticed Emil tensing up.

”I'm sorry, I shouldn't have surprised you like this, I'll leave again.”

Lalli frowned, tried to catch up, but before he could say something Emil had already disappeared among the people. Lalli glaced at the flowers, a small smile playing on his lips. He'd make it right. It wasn't like he didn't love Emil. He closed the door, put the roses in water and went back to making dinner. He would call Emil after he had eaten, before he left for work. They'd figure this out. Together.

#3

Emil beamed when Lalli opened the door. A bouquet of flowers – red roses, pink and red carnations and a couple of dark red peonies all surrounded by ferns – was in his hands.

”Ready for our date?”

He had dressed up and Lalli blushed, looked at his own clothes and closed the door again. They were only going to the café, why did Emil have to make a big deal out of it? He went back to the bedroom, pulled out the nicest clothes he owned. They weren't as fancy at Emil's, but Emil had helped him pick them out when he first moved to Sweden, had said they brought out the color of his eyes.

_”I'll buy them for you. Consider it a moving in gift.”_

Emil had helped him a lot when he moved over. His home was Emil's home, pretty much. Just as Emil's was his. That's why they both had keys to the other's apartment. He changed clothes and opened the door again. Emil's face was broken, but lit up again when he noticed Lalli's change in outfit.

”You look great.”

He held the flowers out for Lalli and Lalli hesitated. Should he have bought flowers as well? He accepted the bouquet with a nod. His mouth felt dry, he wasn't sure how to act and what to say. He had never even imagined playing the game of courtship and here they were. Emil smiled at him.

”Put them in water, then we'll leave.”

Thank Ukko that Emil seemed to understand his predicament. He nodded, went inside to find a vase. He still had one after the tulips Emil had given him for his birthday a year ago. Emil followed him inside but waited by the door as he put the bouquet on the table. He grabbed his coat, Emil made a move to grab his hand, but didn't. Lalli glanced at Emil's hand. Was Emil also nervous? Was that why he was all dressed up? Lalli grabbed Emil's hand and gave it a slight squeeze. Emil's shoulders relaxed and Emil flashed him a shy smile and it looked weird on him because Emil always seemed confident. Lalli bumped their shoulders together, then let go of Emil's hand. His hand felt empty and he put it in his pocket instead. Emil nudged Lalli's side with his elbow.

”Don't worry, Lalli. We have all the time in the world to figure this out.”

Lalli nodded, smiled and moved closer to Emil, close enough that their arms touched as they walked. Emil was right, this was the first step on their road to figure out how to take their relationship to the next level.

#4

Emil had asked Lalli to meet him in the park. They had been together for seven months and Lalli was nervous. Had he done something wrong and Emil was going to break up with him? He put a coat on and wrapped a scarf around his neck before leaving the apartment. He wanted to run, but he didn't. He wanted to turn back, fear of what could happen eating him. But Emil wouldn't do that to him, would he? Lalli swallowed and continued. Red and yellow leaves danced in the wind, landed on the ground and he kicked his feet through the piles.

He could see Emil pacing by the fountain. He had flowers in one hand, Lalli couldn't tell which ones from the distance, and his other hand was in his pocket. He looked worried, nervous and Lalli froze on the spot for a couple of seconds. He clenched his hands, opened them, clenched them. Took five deep breaths to gather himself. Emil noticed him, hid the flowers behind his back and smiled to him, but the smile was small, uncertain. Lalli swallowed and moved towards Emil. One step at the time.

”Emil...?”

”Lalli...”

Emil took a shaky breath, pulled his hand out of the pocket and went down on his knee. He held the flowers – a bouquet of red, white and pink spider flowers – and a small box out for Lalli. Lalli lifted his hands to his mouth, couldn't breathe.

”Lalli... will you marry me?”

He ignored the flowers and the box and sank down as well, wrapped his arms around Emil's neck and pulled him in for a hug.

”Yes. Of course I'll marry you.”

Emil wrapped his arms around Lalli and Lalli felt at home.

#5

Spring rolled around. They were getting married. Lalli was nervous when he woke up, but Emil just wrapped an arm around him, pulled him close and kissed his forehead.

”Don't worry, it'll be fine. It's just a small gathering.”

”What if I get it wrong?”

”Are you having second thoughts?”

”Of course not!”

”As long as you say yes I don't care if you set the whole place on fire.”

Lalli almost laughed and nuzzled closer to Emil.

”That sounds like something you'd do.”

Emil kissed his forehead again, before rolling out of the bed. Lalli watched him as he stretched and got dressed in the white clothes he had picked out for the day. He leaned down and kissed Lalli's cheek and Lalli buried further into the pillows and blankets.

”I'm going on some errands, see you there in two hours?”

”Mmm...”

Emil's steps echoed through their appartment, then the door closed. Lalli stretched, yawned and rolled out of the bed. He went to the kitchen, looked at the food and decided he couldn't eat anything. He showered, the warm water washed over him, allowed his muscles to relax and he leaned against the wall with eyes closed. He got out and got dressed in his own white clothes. White pants and a white shirt with blue trim. A white fur-cape draped over his shoulders. Emil had insisted on the white. Tradition, he had stated and Lalli couldn't care less so he let Emil choose his clothes. They were soft and not at all itchy and that was all that mattered to him. He forced down a piece of bread before leaving the apartment.

They were getting married in the park where Emil had proposed. Lalli remembered the fear that had threatened to overcome him as he walked to the park that day, but this time he felt excited, almost giddy. Onni, Reynir, Sigrun and Mikkel had been invited, as had Emil's family and Taru. Emil caught him by the entrance to the park, pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek.

”You're beautiful.”

”And you're stupid”, Lalli answered with a smile.

”I choose you so I can't be completely stupid.”

Lalli pulled away, noticed the bouquet in Emil's hand. Red and white roses. Unity. Emil had talked with him about it and he had laughed because flowers had become such an integral part of how Emil showed his love for Lalli. He laughed again now and Emil smiled at him.

”You don't have to carry them up to the priest, but I wanted to give them to you before we go up there.”

He kissed Emil, accepted the flowers and hooked his arm to Emil's.

”I love you.”

He didn't say it enough, but Emil had assured him he showed it in other ways. Emil beamed at the words and squeezed Lalli's elbow with his free hand.

”I love you too. Let's get married.”

”We will”, Lalli smiled.

#6

”Happy one year-anniversery, husband!”

Lalli blinked awake, buried his face further into the pillows. The mattress shifted as Emil sank down on it. A tray was placed over Lalli's legs and Lalli yawned before unburying his face. Emil leaned down to kiss him.

”You make me the happiest man on earth, you know”, Emil smiled.

”Too early for romance.”

”Love you too. I made breakfast!”

Lalli sat up, careful to not knock the tray over. There were sandwiches, scrambled eggs, bacon and juice on it. And, because it was Emil, a small bouquet with lilies of the valley. He glanced at Emil, who pulled himself into the bed again, rested against the headboard and kept his eyes at Lalli. Emil raised an eyebrow.

”Not hungry?”

”Hungry, but why?”

”Because I love you and we've been married for a year and I wanted to do something nice for you.”

He pulled Lalli into a hug, kissed his neck, his cheek, his ear. A moan left Lalli's lips and Emil hugged him tighter before letting go and leaning back again. Lalli moved the flowers to his bedside table before leaning against the headboard himself. Emil wrapped an arm around him, pulled him closer and carded his fingers through Lalli's hair.

”You've eaten?”

”Ate while preparing it”, Emil kissed Lalli's head. ”It's all yours.”

Lalli pulled the breakfast closer, started eating. It tasted great and Emil had come a far way from the disaster that managed to burn the food when he attempted to boil an egg.

”Any plans for the day?”

Emil's fingers stopped, his hand fell down and rested on Lalli's shoulder instead. His other hand gestured vaguely at nothing in particular.

”No plans, anything you want to do and I'm up for it. You get to decide today.”

”So I could choose just sleeping?”

”If... if that's what you want to.”

Lalli shook his head, put the cuttlery down and turned around, kissed Emil's cheek.

”We'll decide on something together.”

”I'm okay with that too”, Emil carded Lalli's hair again. ”Now finish your breakfast.”

#+1

It was Lalli's fault. It wasn't Lalli's fault and Emil would yell at him if he knew Lalli blamed himself. It had been one of the new scouts and Emil had played the hero. It was Lalli's fault, because he hadn't been there when the beast snuck into the camp, hadn't been there to protect his husband. Ever since they got married they had talked about changing jobs, maybe adopting kids, but it had never happened because Lalli enjoyed the freedom and Emil wanted to be with Lalli and now...

Lalli clutched the flowers in his hand. Forget-me-not, cyclamen, purple hyacinths, primrose and yellow zinnia, together with one red and one white rose. His legs shook as he walked across the grass, walked through the rows of flat stones. He blinked, tried to keep the tears from his eyes, but it didn't work and he gave up. He pulled his hand across his eyes, dried the tears which were instantly replaced with new ones. No one would judge him, but he didn't want to cry. Crying meant he had let someone in, had let his mind grow soft, weak. But he didn't regret it.

His knees buckled, refused to carry him, but he was at his destination. He cried freely now, didn't want to stop.

”I miss you”, his fingers traced the name on the stone. ”I miss you so much. I'm sorry.”

He leaned forward, his tears stained the stone, the name. It was his fault, he should have been there. Emil would never blame him, Emil knew the risks, Emil knew this could happen. But it was never supposed to be Emil. Lalli's jaws clenched, burned with how tense it was.

”It was supposed to be me.”

His hand clenched harder around the flowers. It was too late for flowers. He should have gotten flowers while the future was still theirs. He leaned his forehead against the stone. It was cold, winter was creeping closer again.

”I quit my job.”

His breath hitched, new tears stained the stone.

”I should have quit it earlier. I'm sorry.”

He sat up again, pulled a hand across his eyes. Put the flowers on the stone, next to the name.

”I wasn't supposed to lose you. You were my world.”

He wrapped his fingers around the hem of his shirt, pulled at it. He wanted to just lie down on the ground, stay there until nature took his body and allowed his soul to follow where his body couldn't go. He couldn't do that. He dried his eyes again.

”I miss you.”

He wished so much for an answer his heart clenched. He took a shaky breath, couldn't look at the stone any longer, couldn't look at the name. Couldn't look at the result of his failure.

”I'm moving to Iceland.”

He didn't want to move but he couldn't stay. Not when his everything was gone, when the only thing that held him to life and happiness had been lost. His fingers found the edge of the stone again, as if he hoped it could convince him he was doing the right thing. The stone couldn't talk, no one would talk to him through it. He had managed to move on even though Lalli had wanted to hold him back with everything he could.

He wanted to explain his decicion. He wanted to apologize until he lost his breath. He wanted to ask for forgivness until his throat was broken and bleeding. He wanted to yell and scream until he was dragged away. He got to his feet instead. His eyes danced over the flowers. Would he have liked them?

”I love you. I'll come back, I promise.”

He took a step back. He wasn't sure he would ever be strong enough to return, wasn't sure he was strong enough to move away. But he had to. He swallowed.

”Goodbye Emil. I'll never forget you.”

He turned his back to the grave and walked away, leaving his everything behind. It would be years until he was strong enough to come back.

**Author's Note:**

> I uh may have cried a little when I wrote the +1-part. Hope you enjoyed this!
> 
> (I also have a plan for his return but I probably won't write that)


End file.
